long time no post !!
anyway.. just wanna state down some plans i have for MY future... penning it down seems to make it easier to fulfill...
starting from short to long term plans..
the most short term one is to obtain driving license by the end of 2010.. i know i still young. and not many people get their drivers license at 18, but.. when i think about it.. i find that it is better to get it earlier..
next year is 3rd year in poly... most probably i'll be shut off from the world due to final year project or attachment. so.. dragging the license till next year will be unadvisable, cos i know myself, i'm not good at managing time. so i figured to get it now while i have the cash. besides, if dragged later, the prices will increase as well. so might as well get it over and done with right?
next up is more of my finances. currently i am trying to understand the language of stocks. why? cause they are a good investment. personally, i find that if i am able to understand the economy, it will be beneficial to me. i asked my dad, he started small but it is gradually increasing, bit by bit.
start up sum will most probably be from my army pay. if i am able to save up and not spend unnecessarily during my army years, i should be able to save a good 10k and above. well... hopefully... i am able to find my mrs right as well.. after ORD, i wanna concentrate on career...
chances is that job hopping will occur during the first few years, thus rushing into marriage is seriously tempting but... no, it will not be beneficial.. dun like the idea of getting my family to suffer with me... anyway, depending on which unit i am posted to i guess. gotta find out the average pay of NS people.. thus, after army, the saved up cash will most probably be saved up, either for investments in stocks or .. i'll probably save up more for a house. either or. Anyway, after army, i'll head either to uni or straight to work. lets say i enter into university, if it is local.. chances is that i will not be getting a part-time job. if it is overseas, then i doubt i have much of a choice. either way, i'm saving up my army savings. not gonna touch that unless its a sure die situation..
mmm.. anything to consider at this point? hmmm... no idea... but i really hope to have a stable girlfriend after i've busted out of army..
oh ya, for girlfriend... i'm looking for someone with time.. in other words, must be willing to spend loads of time with me la. guys talk about high expense girlfriends, girls must be talking about guys having too much expectations from their girl, just thinking. i'm a person that requires loads of company.. no doubt i am alone most of the time, but.. truth is that i do not enjoy that. another thing is that i want freedom !!
loads of FREEDOM !!!
in everything.. even in career...
for my career.. i dun wish for it to clutter up my life, like... everyday just work like a cow or something, i wanna have freedom, at least i still wanna have my own "me-time"
for family, i just wanna have privacy. like for my current family, i get my own room, that's enough for me. everyday to just return into my own nest, and telling myself "this is my life !!"
hate restrictions.. even when i am dating a girl.. i wanna have to freedom to express, to express my feelings, good or bad...
a major barrier for this day and age is the differences in ideology, parents are thinking WAY too much for their kids. the kids of today seem to have no brains or they act like robots. when they reach the teenage years, most people just break loose. they do things that they never would have thought themselves to do.
kids today should be given more freedom, cause this way, they mature faster as well....
currently i know that i have a plan for the future, good and bad.. i am prepared to face it all.. but the fear comes in not having a future... my desire now is for a female companion... at the same time i want back my freedom..... the freedom to walk on the streets ... the freedom to talk to her parents, the freedom to be able to contact her...
i seem to have deviated from the main topic of this post... back to topic !
back from where i left off.. i think i deviated when i talked about.. stocks? i think so.
You may be asking, i'm just a kiddo, age 18 this year. why on earth would i want to invest in stocks?
well.. thing is, i find that stocks, is the gateway to earning cash. no doubt i can slog out on the business world, but.... thing is, what i lost my job or something?
not trying to be negative, but.. with stocks, even with no jobs, the ability to invest and study the economy is valuable. if i am able to study the local economy, and probably move on to the global economy, not only am i able to earn through investments, but... i will be able to have a direction even if i lost my job. being able to understand the surroundings, i will know what type of jobs will be earning, which jobs do the economy favor and stuffs like that.
valuable i would say.
hmmm... anything else?? i yearn for.. financial stability. cause with proper finances.. i am guaranteed of having to worry less about spendings right? it provides more stability for tomorrow. in the long run, i wanna be having a main career, one that brings in the basic living expenses for me and my family. stocks will be .. like an extra commitment. like the side dish of a meal. helps make the main course taste better.
main focus for this year is to decide whether or not to be christian.. cause... being christian isn't just being christian, it is far more than that. being christian.. i can't have the freedom of communication with non-christian girls. i cant get too close to them and stuffs. at the same time, i dun talk to the girls at church at all. thats why i worry about my future. i worry that.. i will be single forever. i need a visible goal to work towards, having an illusion or just parts of the puzzle does not motivate me.
i need a picture of the puzzle to help motivate me to complete the puzzle..
i wanna give up all the God business.. its tiring. i dunno how long more i can sustain being hammered..
i wanna communicate with people.. both boys and girls.. but at the same time, i am an... attention seeker... i need the attention. when i speak with church guys, it is just face to face, so long as we are not physically together, it seems like i am living in my own world. even when i am with them.. truth is, i still feel separated. they all play soccer... i have to listen to them talk greek while i stare into blank space. i'm fine with that, but... its happening most of the time. guys require common topics to talk about.. its.. the male hormones i guess? always requiring a common topic to talk about.
as for females, they are different. females in general do not need a topic to talk for hours. they can be talking about absolutely nothing and still seem to enjoy themselves. the lack of common topic i guess is what attracts me to the females. church people are... hypocrites. really. they seem to lie all the time, its like their life is by itself a lie. there's not much truth, making it all a wonderful facade of smiles. i dun really like that
i chat with secular girls.. they are.. more .. open. christians in general like to act good and all. but truth is that you are not.
personally i think i have achieved truthfulness in terms of my life. if i have something to voice out, i will voice it out. maybe at a delayed timing, but i still voice out. Another thing is that i am preventing myself to lie. if something is wrong with me and you ask me about it. i will tell you if i wanna say. if not, i will just decline the offer to share and get on with life. most people are obviously not ok. but when you ask, they say that they are alright and that there's nothing wrong with them.
its considered a lie right?
a lie to me is not something that is fake. but it is something that is not true.
what do you think?
this post of messed up with issues flying all over the place. cause my head is in a mess, pressured by.. the dark issues of life.. cluttered with mess and such..
my apologies, but i seriously need to get my life right. i need an accountability personal XD
i am so screwed~
